"Dancing With My Eyes Closed": A Journey Through Love, Loss, and Unspoken Grief
- Karen Bulinski Mathison
- Sep 29
- 2 min read
Content warning: Discussion of depression, loss, and mental health
When Lyrics Become Life
Music has an extraordinary power—to predict, to heal, to remember. Sometimes, a song becomes more than just a melody. It becomes a map of our emotional landscape, a testament to moments both lived and lost.
Ed Sheeran's "Perfect" isn't just a love song. For some, it's a narrative of hope, of connection, of dreams suspended between what was and what could have been.
"Perfect" by Ed Sheeran "Eyes Closed" by Ed Sheeran
From the album Divide, 2017 From the album Subtract, 2023
Atlantic Records Atlantic Records
The Lyrics That Speak
"I found a love to carry more than just my secrets - To carry love, to carry children of our own - We're still kids, but we're still in love Fighting against all odds I know I'll be alright this time"
These words aren't just romantic prose. They're a promise. A hope. A dream that sometimes shatters but refuses to completely break.
The Unspoken Grief of Interrupted Love
When love is interrupted—not by choice, but by circumstance—the grief is complex. It's not just mourning a person, but mourning potential futures, unshared homes, unborn children.
The line "I hope someday I'll share her home" becomes a haunting reminder of promises that will never be fulfilled, of intimacies forever suspended in the realm of "what if".
Mental Health: The Invisible Companion
Depression isn't always about a single, definitive moment. Sometimes it's a constant companion, a lens through which joy is filtered, muted, almost feared.
The terror of fully experiencing joy—knowing how deeply its absence can hurt—is a form of emotional self-preservation. It's a survival mechanism born from repeated loss, from a mind that has learned to protect itself by remaining slightly detached.
Photographs and Phantom Memories
What happens when memories are so sparse they feel almost imaginary? Two photographs to represent years of love. Memories so fragile they could dissolve if not carefully preserved.
In the digital age, our memories are often validated by images. But what about the memories that exist only in heart and mind? Are they any less real?
Resilience: Not a Destination, But a Journey
Resilience isn't about never falling. It's about the courage to get back up, even when the getting up feels impossible. It's about acknowledging that healing isn't linear—it's a landscape of peaks and valleys.
A Note on Grief
Grief doesn't have a rulebook. It doesn't follow logic. It arrives in waves, sometimes gentle, sometimes tsunami-like. And sometimes, it finds its voice in a song.
If you're struggling with depression or thoughts of self-harm, please reach out:988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline1-800-273-8255Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741
Comments